


A Job Well Done

by mescalinen



Series: The Pharmacy [1]
Category: Eddsworld - All Media Types
Genre: Attempt at Humor, Comedy, Doctor/Patient, Gen, Het, Het and Slash, Humor, I Don't Even Know, Implied Sexual Content, Slash, implied sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-30
Updated: 2018-11-30
Packaged: 2019-09-02 20:24:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 660
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16794103
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mescalinen/pseuds/mescalinen
Summary: Two pharmacists try to help a desperate man who clearly overdosed on an aphrodisiac.





	A Job Well Done

The pharmacy door swings open, and the pharmacist looks up.

‘Welcome, sir!’ she smiles.

A tall man walks towards her, shuffling his hips oddly and obviously uncomortable. His walking is skewed and the pharmacist furrows her eyebrows in confusion.

‘Hallo, ma’am,’ the man laughs awkwardly and then squints at the pharmacist’s nametag, ‘Tamara...’

‘How may I help you?’ Tamara asks.

‘You see, uhum,’ the man leans with his weight over the desk and Tamara shuffles back a bit, ‘a few days ago someone here sold me an aphrodisiac?...’

Tamara’s eyes widen in understanding and she bites her cheeks to stop herself from smiling. That would be very unprofessional and rude, after all.

‘Are you unhappy with the results of the product, sir?’ Tamara asks.

‘Uhum, no, well, I mean— it worked great, my wife loved the effect but, um,’ the man pauses, ‘it seems the effect is quite long-lasting, because now I can’t keep my hands away not only from my wife but from every woman in the streets.’

Tamara blinks.

‘Would you like a relaxant, sir?’

The man flinches suddenly as Tamara speaks.

‘Yea, would be— would be nice, uhuh.’

Tamara nods, smiling. She leans down and takes out a bottle of relaxant pills, placing them on the counter.

‘Anything else, sir?’ she says quietly, blinking at the man.

‘Agh! Stop!’ the man yells, making Tamara almost fall backwards.

‘Is everything, alright, sir?’ Tamara asks softly.

‘Your voice! It’s too—‘ the man reaches a hand towards Tamara and then jerks it away, ‘ah, I can’t take your gentle voice, get a man in here!’ the man pleads, sinking down for a moment to squeeze his thighs together.

‘O- of course,’ Tamara mumbles. ‘Tom!’

The door behind the counter and Tamara opens, and out comes a male pharmacist.

He smiles kindly.

‘What is it, Tamara?’ he asks gently and shyly.

The man almost falls down, groaning.

‘Stop! His voice is even more sexual— agh!’ the man yells.

Tom places a soft hand on the man’s arm. ‘Sir, is anything wrong?’

The man groans again and jerks his arm away from the pharmacist’s.

‘What are you _doing_ to me?! Give me the damn pills— a- agh!’

‘Sir, we have to get your name in the system—‘ Tamara begins, but is interrupted.

‘Tord! Tord ***!’ the man yells.

He slams the money down on the counter and runs away, the door swinging behind him.  
Tamara and Tom glance at each other with confused expressions.

* * *

It’s about an hour later that the door opens again. Tamara and Tom look up. It’s the man again, Tord.  
This time, he’s almost dancing and skipping with joy as he walks closer to the pharmacists.

‘I see the relaxants worked well on you,’ Tamara smiles as she says to Tord.

‘Nope! Didn’t work at all!’ the man gleams, ‘I fucked two women as soon as I walked out.’

‘Then— then why are you so cheerful?’ Tom asks.

‘I gave a handful of the relaxants to my wife,’ Tord explains, ‘so she was so chill when I told her I’d cheated on her.’

Well, um, we’re happy for you!’ Tamara shrugs, giggling.

‘I want to ask for ten more bottles, so she can be this relaxed when I go out fishing, to the sauna with the boys and when I drink!’ Tord laughs, getting out the money.

Tom and Tamara glance at each other and shrug.

‘Sure, why not,’ Tom says as Tamara is getting out the bottles and placing them on the counters.

Tord pays, and then looks at the two pharmacists with a grin.

‘Now, since you two were so helpful for me today, as well as payment I would like to express my thanks as a reward.’

It is when Tord winks, that Tom and Tamara understand what he means. Looks like the effect of the aphrodisiac was still working.

Tom and Tamara look at each other again and their black eyes glint.

‘Sure, why not.’

**Author's Note:**

> inspired by dizel show (дизель шоу)


End file.
